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#318176 - 11/22/19 03:58 PM Are you ready for the Finals?
Hamish Howl Offline
journeyman

Registered: 11/21/19
Posts: 608
Loc: Tucson, AZ
1. When you wake up screaming, it's because
A. Donald Trump really IS president.
B. Nazis really ARE walking around in broad daylight.
C. Weasels ran off with your spouse.
D. All of the above.

2. The collection cup for date night is now collecting
A. Vomit.
B. Blood.
C. Your fingernail clippings.
D. Someone else's fingernails.

3. You are running because
A. Insane cops.
B. Nazi death creatures from the hollow earth.
C. More weasels.
D. You still have legs.

4. You are crying because
A. You vaguely remember having loved ones.
B. Tear gas.
C. Nobody witnessed you all shiny and chrome.
D. "irregardless" made it into the dictionary.

5. You won't eat your pudding because
A. You didn't eat all of your meat.
B. You knew the guy the pudding used to be.
C. You no longer have the required orifices.
D. It's frozen solid, like everything else for a hundred miles in any direction.

6. Even though the Earth is vomiting up the dead, and the government hasn't issued any edicts in weeks, you
A. Are safe in your buried storage container, eating your previous relatives, offspring, etc.
B. At least still have your guns.
C. Managed to save your waifu pillow
D. All of the above.

7. Your neighbors are all raptured, leaving you behind with the weasels. You
A. Help yourself to their stuff.
B. Console yourself that at least that crooked Hillary didn't win.
C. Run to the nearest church and explain to God that he has overlooked your exceptionalism.
D. Dance while the weasels rip your flesh.

8. You are placed in charge of morale. Your slogan is
A. Fallout is the new confetti.
B. Whiteboard your optimized personal demise.
C. Weasels are just fun with fangs.
D. I'm not crying.

9. Your house is surrounded by zombies. You
A. Don't notice.
B. Don't care.
C. Are green with envy.
D. Are a member of the zombie horde.

10. Starvation has given you visions. You realize
A. The Mormons - of all people - had it right. You scream your rage to the universe. It doesn't care.
B. You have run out of relatives and your storage container's air is getting pretty manky.
C. That tickling sensation? Weasels.
D. You're late for work. Again.
_________________________
What can we do to help you stop screaming?

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#318178 - 11/22/19 04:32 PM Re: Are you ready for the Finals? [Re: Hamish Howl]
logtroll Offline
veteran

Registered: 04/26/10
Posts: 10283
Loc: One of the Mexicos
_________________________
“You never change things by fighting the existing reality.
To change something, build a new model that makes the old model obsolete.”
– R. Buckminster Fuller

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#318182 - 11/22/19 06:33 PM Re: Are you ready for the Finals? [Re: logtroll]
Greger Online   content


Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 11/24/06
Posts: 17059
Loc: Florida
There is a bright side even to the Trump administration.

I mean, really, what's the worst that could happen?
_________________________
Good coffee, good weed, and time on my hands...

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#318205 - 11/23/19 01:22 AM Re: Are you ready for the Finals? [Re: Hamish Howl]
Jeffery J. Haas Offline
It's the Despair Quotient!
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/03/04
Posts: 15728
Loc: Whittier, California
You know who would really give Hamish a run for his money?
Schlack, that's who.
I've been trying to reach him to get him back here.

I guarantee you if Schlack and Hamish were to meet here the rest of us would be truly howling. ROTFMOL
_________________________
"The Best of the Leon Russell Festivals" DVD
deepfreezefilms.com

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#318209 - 11/23/19 03:42 AM Re: Are you ready for the Finals? [Re: Jeffery J. Haas]
Hamish Howl Offline
journeyman

Registered: 11/21/19
Posts: 608
Loc: Tucson, AZ
Originally Posted By: Jeffery J. Haas
You know who would really give Hamish a run for his money?
Schlack, that's who.
I've been trying to reach him to get him back here.

I guarantee you if Schlack and Hamish were to meet here the rest of us would be truly howling. ROTFMOL


I'm down. I love a good rant.
_________________________
What can we do to help you stop screaming?

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#318233 - 11/24/19 08:02 AM Re: Are you ready for the Finals? [Re: Hamish Howl]
Hamish Howl Offline
journeyman

Registered: 11/21/19
Posts: 608
Loc: Tucson, AZ
For each "D", give yourself a point. When you have 10 points, you get let into the shipping container/shelter.
_________________________
What can we do to help you stop screaming?

Top

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