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#318590 - 12/03/19 06:41 PM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Hamish Howl]
Jeffery J. Haas Offline
It's the Despair Quotient!
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/03/04
Posts: 15728
Loc: Whittier, California
Originally Posted By: Hamish Howl
Documentary


O'Brien: "Julian here says 'We could get Odo high and convince him he's Jayne Mansfield.' So we did."

Interviewer: "How did that work out?"

Sisko: "Odo got right into it. Bashir is going to town on him, and then and then...."

Odo: "And then I revealed the fact that Earth drugs don't work on me."


Mamie Van Doren should get a peek at this script. LOL
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#318596 - 12/03/19 08:40 PM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Hamish Howl]
Hamish Howl Offline
journeyman

Registered: 11/21/19
Posts: 608
Loc: Tucson, AZ
“Ignore that nightmare in the holodeck. Just another ugly refugee from the original series, some doom-struck Scots gimp who couldn't handle the pressure. Riker has never been able to accept the notion—often espoused by reformed holodeck users and especially popular among those on probation—that you can get a lot more sex without holodecks than with them. And neither have I, for that matter.”
- Jean Luc Picard, "Fear and Loathing in Alpha Quadrant"
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#318604 - 12/04/19 04:49 AM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Hamish Howl]
pondering_it_all Offline
veteran

Registered: 02/27/06
Posts: 10345
Loc: North San Diego County
Marrying a shape-shifter might offer some distinct advantages, if they continue to like you enough to take the form of your choice upon request. Besides, Odo seemed like a pretty decent being.

What's ironic, is that this sort of technology is pretty much available now: We have VR goggles so you can see any media while having sex, that you want. We also have tricky aps available, so you can stick anybody's head on any body in 3D CGI with a little effort or expense. We also have silicone sex dolls, so your body can have the sensations to match what you are seeing through your VR goggles. It's not perfect, but apparently it's already good enough to get past the Uncanny Valley most of the time.

I see it as hope for the terminally ugly, obnoxious, diseased, or deformed. But don't be surprised if it goes mainstream in the coming decades.

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#318609 - 12/04/19 06:12 PM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: pondering_it_all]
Jeffery J. Haas Offline
It's the Despair Quotient!
Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 08/03/04
Posts: 15728
Loc: Whittier, California
Originally Posted By: pondering_it_all

I see it as hope for the terminally ugly, obnoxious, diseased, or deformed. But don't be surprised if it goes mainstream in the coming decades.


Dear God, I hope it's after my own time here on Earth.
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#318618 - 12/04/19 10:20 PM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Jeffery J. Haas]
Greger Offline


Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 11/24/06
Posts: 17271
Loc: Florida
Too late...internet porn has already taken over and birthrates worldwide are dropping.
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#318626 - 12/05/19 01:20 AM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Hamish Howl]
Hamish Howl Offline
journeyman

Registered: 11/21/19
Posts: 608
Loc: Tucson, AZ
"This was at the worst of the dominion incursion, you understand. We were being driven back along every front. Deep Space 9 was lost, the wormhole was lost...Hell, they were within striking distance of Earth, with only the 3rd fleet in their way...But we were holding the line, giving up every meter grudgingly.

And then the Americans came. They were loud. They yelled at us. They said "PWNT, NOOB" and "GIT GUD" and "HEY DOMINION WE R IN UR BASE KILLING UR DUDES."

I hated them. I still hate them. I hate them so much my dick is hard."
- Captain Sisko (retired)
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#318627 - 12/05/19 02:04 AM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Hamish Howl]
Greger Offline


Carpal Tunnel

Registered: 11/24/06
Posts: 17271
Loc: Florida
Quote:
And then the Americans came.


That's when the story usually takes a turn for the worse.
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#318642 - 12/05/19 01:37 PM Re: Star Trek 40 oz on repeat. [Re: Hamish Howl]
Hamish Howl Offline
journeyman

Registered: 11/21/19
Posts: 608
Loc: Tucson, AZ
I'm Hamish. This here is Greger. We've been in security for a year. A year. What, kiddo, is the average life expectancy in a red shirt? A WEEK. One. [censored]. Week. You see the captain, yeah, that prick. Getting his dick wet in some green piece with antenna on her damn head.

You try, you little s***, you TRY even TALKING to one of those girls down on G deck. They'll have you in the brig. Why? Because you're a dead man walking, and what young woman in Starfleet wants to date a walking corpse? No. You are not getting laid. Not in this lifetime.

So what you do, see, you wait until Scotty gets juiced on coolant, then you sneak in the transporter room and have your dick transported forward 5 mm, then back. Loop that program. That'll get you off. Go. Go give it a try.

*redshirt leaves*

"Why you staring at me that way, Greger? You know he won't be here next week and he ain't getting laid THIS week, so he didn't need that thing in the first place. And God knows where the [censored] thing will wind up. Could be funny.
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