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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 6,388
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Originally Posted By: Scoutgal
Originally Posted By: Ezekiel
O teu silncio uma nau com tdas as velas pandas...
Brandas, as brisas brincam nas flmulas, teu sorriso...
E o teu sorriso no teu silncio as escadas e as andas
Com que me finjo mais alto e ao p de qualquer paraiso...


Fernando Pessoa
A Hora Absurda


Jeg likevel si at hndsignaler er veien g! BTW, a lovely poem!


signal mkono na tabasamu?


"The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them."
Lenny Bruce

"The cleverest of all, in my opinion, is the man who calls himself a fool at least once a month."
Dostoevsky



Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 27,583
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From a friend:

Quote:
Dear Santa,
How are you? How is Mrs Claus? I hope everyone, from the
reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.
Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones

* *

Dear Timmy,
Thank you for you letter. Mrs Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried about all the time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldnt want you to
get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think Ill bring you something you can go outside and play with.
Merry Christmas,
Santa Claus

* *

Mr. Claus,
Seeing that I have fulfilled the naughty vs. Nice contract, set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldnt want to turn this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, dont you think that a jibe at
my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit trite?
Respectfully,
Tim Jones

* *

Mr. Jones,
While I have acknowledged you have met the nice criteria,
need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorneys have been
on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social
skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.
Very Truly Yours,
S Claus

* *

Now look here Fat Man,
I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was
attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends into this. Now you just be dissing me. Im about to tweet my boys and were gonna be waiting for your fat ass and Im taking my game console, my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!
T-Bone

* *

Listen Pizza Face,
Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? He sees you when youre sleeping; He knows when youre awake. Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your s*** wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, youd throw up your Totinos pizza roll all over the carpet of your moms basement. Youre not getting what you asked for, but Im still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in your ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.
S Clizzy

* *

Dear Santa,
Bring me whatever you see fit. Ill appreciate anything.
Timmy

* *

Timmy,
Thats what I thought, you little bastard.
Santa

* *


milk and Girl Scout cookies ;-)

Save your breath-You may need it to blow up your date.




Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 27,583
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Originally Posted By: Ezekiel
Originally Posted By: Scoutgal
Originally Posted By: Ezekiel
O teu silncio uma nau com tdas as velas pandas...
Brandas, as brisas brincam nas flmulas, teu sorriso...
E o teu sorriso no teu silncio as escadas e as andas
Com que me finjo mais alto e ao p de qualquer paraiso...


Fernando Pessoa
A Hora Absurda


Jeg likevel si at hndsignaler er veien g! BTW, a lovely poem!


signal mkono na tabasamu?


Die Filipino nie ten volle nie vertaal in Engels ... kom weer?


milk and Girl Scout cookies ;-)

Save your breath-You may need it to blow up your date.




Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 6,388
old hand
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Posts: 6,388
Quote:
... BTW, a lovely poem!


Isn't it! Pessoa is amongst my favorite poets. smile


"The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them."
Lenny Bruce

"The cleverest of all, in my opinion, is the man who calls himself a fool at least once a month."
Dostoevsky



Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 3,893
K
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K
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Posts: 3,893
Ya peepel are all a gittin purdy good at that ol google translate I tell ya.


Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
Joined: May 2005
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Originally Posted By: Scoutgal
...But the song held it's popularity so well, that we chose it as the theme for our 8th grade graduation dance. Just because it came out in 1967, doesn't mean that we couldn't use it in 1971...

Pretty sophisticated 13 year olds. For most tweens, a four year old song was a life-time ago. coffee


Contrarian, extraordinaire


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Originally Posted By: Ken Condon
Ya peepel are all a gittin purdy good at that ol google translate I tell ya.


It's a lot of fun! ThumbsUp


milk and Girl Scout cookies ;-)

Save your breath-You may need it to blow up your date.




Joined: Jan 2001
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Originally Posted By: california rick
Originally Posted By: Scoutgal
...But the song held it's popularity so well, that we chose it as the theme for our 8th grade graduation dance. Just because it came out in 1967, doesn't mean that we couldn't use it in 1971...

Pretty sophisticated 13 year olds. For most tweens, a four year old song was a life-time ago. coffee


Yeah, well that's how we roll down here in SoCal. grin


milk and Girl Scout cookies ;-)

Save your breath-You may need it to blow up your date.




Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,262
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Originally Posted By: Scoutgal
From a friend:

Quote:
Dear Santa,
How are you? How is Mrs Claus? I hope everyone, from the
reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.
Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones

* *

Dear Timmy,
Thank you for you letter. Mrs Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried about all the time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldnt want you to
get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think Ill bring you something you can go outside and play with.
Merry Christmas,
Santa Claus

* *

Mr. Claus,
Seeing that I have fulfilled the naughty vs. Nice contract, set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldnt want to turn this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, dont you think that a jibe at
my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit trite?
Respectfully,
Tim Jones

* *

Mr. Jones,
While I have acknowledged you have met the nice criteria,
need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorneys have been
on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social
skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.
Very Truly Yours,
S Claus

* *

Now look here Fat Man,
I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was
attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends into this. Now you just be dissing me. Im about to tweet my boys and were gonna be waiting for your fat ass and Im taking my game console, my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!
T-Bone

* *

Listen Pizza Face,
Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? He sees you when youre sleeping; He knows when youre awake. Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your s*** wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, youd throw up your Totinos pizza roll all over the carpet of your moms basement. Youre not getting what you asked for, but Im still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in your ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.
S Clizzy

* *

Dear Santa,
Bring me whatever you see fit. Ill appreciate anything.
Timmy

* *

Timmy,
Thats what I thought, you little bastard.
Santa

* *
ThumbsUp The letters sound vaguely like those exchanged between Santa and the little reprobate next door.

I was really miffed when the little, vertically challenged, Napoleon complexed, game addicted, couch potato with a mouth capable of making George Carlin blush, hired me. He promised me a third of the value of gifts received.

I was actually happy when he signed the retainer agreement.

There was hope when the Right Honorable Paddy Pushover, esteemed judge sitting in the Circuit Court of Cook County won the assignment roulette. His lawyerly offspring were friends of mine from the State's Attorney's Office.

Everything was going well. Motions were filed.

Motions were won.

By our side.

Then, December 26th arrived.

Do you have any idea how worthless a lump of coal, the size of a charcoal nugget used in barbecues really is?

I had to get Rudolph to stomp on a penny, only to flatten it into a thin disc that could be cut into 3 pieces.


"I am young, whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, and happy." ~~~ Kato Havas
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 43,930
Likes: 1
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Originally Posted By: Scoutgal
Yeah, well that's how we roll down here in SoCal. grin

Us badass NorCal'ers roll on chrome - na mean, yo?



Contrarian, extraordinaire


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