A woman was at the bar waiting for a beer when a butt-ugly big old redneck came up behind her and slapped her on the butt.
He said, "Hey sexy, how about giving me your number."
She looked at him and said, "Have you got a pen?"
His eyes lit up and he said, "I sure do!"
She said, "Well, you better get back into it, before the farmer notices you're missing."