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Originally Posted by pondering_it_all
My point here is that the abuse of power imbalance was far worse than the sex. She actually told me at the time that the sex was very enjoyable! So I guess he was very good at doing what he did without hurting her physically. But he really screwed her up mentally.
No. She didn't know what the power imbalance was at the time. She was [censored] up by the sex. She didn't "enjoy it", she was not mature enough to know what that means. Her body or her mind.
Let's just leave it at that.
I'm so sorry that happened to her.

Sorry. The dismissive talk bugs me.
I'm familiar with wink and a nod too in my own relatives.



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It's easy to talk about it now that they are both dead. So is my step-mother, so I'm the last person still standing who had any part in it. I don't have to be concerned about hurting anybody's feelings or retraumatizing them. She told me directly that she enjoyed the sex, and I was an avid masturbator myself before that by age 10, so I didn't doubt her. Many girls are masturbators before 10, without being molested by anyone. It's just something they like, and they do it just for that reason. Some girls don't and their discovery of their sexual nature may happen many years later. That's in the range of normal human behavior. Sex really doesn't carry all the emotional baggage we experience, for young kids.

I didn't see her for several years after that, since our step-mother had a horrible unsympathetic jealous reaction and sent her into foster care. Effectively, mom blamed the victim! That's the start of my life-long disillusionment with my step-mother. But after he got out of prison, mom still divorced dad when my little sister was 7, just to get my little sister out of there. I left home at 17, and they immediately moved out. I suppose my presence in the house made my step-mother feel more secure about dad not molesting my little sister, but I never thought that was very smart myself.

I did interact with my sister later, when she attended the college my dad used to teach at. She had some therapy, and was doing well. Had normal relationships with boyfriends, and married a great fellow I just saw on Friday at their younger daughter's wedding. I believed what she had to say about it then and later as an adult. If some choose not to believe her, that says more about them than her. She was very well-centered and stabile as an adult, was a great wife and mother, and lived a peaceful and comfortable life. She was brilliant, too, and worked for the navy as a computer programmer before she married. Cancer took her much too soon, but she did get to see grandchildren of her older daughter.


We're flying electric helicopters on Mars yet you can't turn on your clothes dryer in Texas. That's because scientists are in charge of Mars, and Republicans are in charge of Texas.
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What I am about to write, only Scout knew as she was the only person I ever told...and it was in person as one of our many get-togethers.

On the lyrics thread, I alluded to being a teen and having a 27 year old boyfriend. I was 17, 17-1/2 to be exact. My parents didn't know, because my mom would have been all over the police to do something about it.

Yes, I knew my b/f could get into trouble, therefore I kept silent to protect him.

But...there was one other, when I was in eighth grade and I was 13-1/2. That too was kept from my parents because I knew that one would have gotten the guy in serious trouble. He was actually known to my family and I am the one who presented the relationship to my parents of having a "big brother." THAT was my idea so that I could spend more time with him.

I am the one started things off, because I knew I was gay. I didn't even have an inkling that he was gay. In fact, he was seeing some women. The guy was exactly the type of guy I liked: facial hair, hairy chest. (My taste in men has never changed my entire life). He too was 27 at the time. Yes there was a 14 year age difference.

I was not coerced, I was not forced, in fact, it was truly the other way around. I seduced him. I was the aggressor.

Today, I sometimes think about my two relationships from the guys perspective, and I could never have a relationship with a teen. First off, they're annoying. Secondly, they do not have masculine features to speak of. Some gays will do anyone. I am actually very picky and have always been very picky about who I choose as a partner. I'd rather be by myself, than to settle.

My point in sharing this is from the perspective of a teen who knew exactly what was up, and thought of way of getting what he wanted and to continue getting what he wanted, AND, I understood the legal consequences for my partner.

Now, if I was coerced, all I would have done is tell my mom, and she would have had the police all over the guy like white on rice. But, I did not have those types of relationships. In fact, I once met a guy who I didn't like after I met him, and he kept calling me, and I told him, if he ever called me again, I was going to tell my parents. He never called me again.

I knew how to handle myself and steer to get what I wanted, and threaten getting my parents and the police involved to those I didn't want near me. It was always my choice and I was always in control of my situation.


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Ok, I’ve been reluctant to do this but I have to ask: can we please stop with personal stories about sex?

This is not what I believed CHB to be and there are a lot of other places on the web for this kind of thing. If this is what you all want from this site, then I am most certainly in the wrong place.


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We can always talk in the abstract, but shared stories make it real. My story was simply to tell one teens side of the story - and from I am gathering, there is a misperception that teens are always the victim - and my story was simply to share that is not always true.


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Teens are the horniest little bastards on the planet and teens have been making their own decisions since our species started living that long. Parents just try to keep them on the rails until they grow up(at about age 35) And the law just tries to prevent too much abuse(which is gonna happen anyway)

There are a lot of gray areas.

We haven't had any women in the locker room for a long time(wink wink nudge nudge)

Men are like dogs. They will get into all sorts of disgusting stuff, roll around in it and enjoy it.

Like you girls, I was a virgin until I was 18. We talked about sex but never did anything. And if we did we never told anybody. That was the best policy then and it's the best now.


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The topic of this thread is about a huge number of children in France having sexual relations with adults. Ranters posting about their own experiences gives us the opportunity to obtain insights into more aspects of this topic, so these posts are entirely appropriate for this thread. If any ranter does not want to read these posts, there are a large number of other threads they may enjoy more.

I love reading posts from all of you, and I am happy that all of you are here, but every thread may not be comfortable for every ranter. Life is messy, and everybody dies in the end. Maybe CHB should have thread ratings, so ranters can avoid threads they may find objectionable.

Last edited by pondering_it_all; 10/11/21 10:15 PM.

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Human sexuality is a topic of fraught with peril as Gregor alluded to. It has been said, or I at least have read, that in certain areas of central Asia 10% of the people contain DNA traces from Genghis Khan. Man that guy got around! I wonder what dating site he used?

OK.

So joke there…..


Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
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Originally Posted by Ken Condon
I wonder what dating site he used?
It was called "Rape and Pillage", a 'custom and culture' app of the day.


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To change something, build a new model that makes the old model obsolete.
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It's the Despair Quotient!
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It's the Despair Quotient!
Carpal Tunnel
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This thread has kinda turned a wee bit "icky"...


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